The Funny Farm

Internets Time Waster

^{Saturday, New Year's Day 2007}

Happy Midling New Year! That's right, our own adaptation of Shire Reckoning was based on the calculation Yule Day (Midling) = Christmas (Gregorian)*. Which makes today the start of the year, as well as one of the few days not within any month. And yet another announcement that our home publishing empire just might crank out a few 2008 Midling Calendars to be distributed to a select few. As well as announcing that the general public is, as always, invited to purchase a fine example of a different way to look at time - what with its' encouragement of the three day work week, and festive outlooks upon life for the whole year (two Fridays** and no Mondays every week certainly seems to help). Email me if you are interested in more details on this subject (please put Midling calendar in the subject line of the email if that's the case).

But that's not what I wanted to tell you about today. Nor do I feel that I could do justice to the good times and great festivities at the various places I have been since I posted here last. Let's just say that I continue to believe that I am one of the luckiest beings in the multiverse, and I hope to continue to appreciate what that luck brings to me as my time unfolds.

No, I just wanted to show you this wondrous waste of bandwith*** that PSoTD pointed all of us to. Here's just a few of the many peculiar aristocratic titles I generated with only two variants of my first name:

Earl Tom the Functional of Great Leering The Right Reverend Thomas the Ineffable of Molton St Anywhere His Most Noble Lord Thomas the Edible of New Scagglethorpe Viscount Thomas the Inchoate of Happy Bottomshire Reverend Earl Thomas the Winsome of Lower Hellswicke His Grace Lord Thomas the Rustic of Lower Bumhampton His Most Noble Lord Tom the Insouciant of West Smeesborough His Exalted Highness Duke Tom the Sentient of Hope End Sir Tom the Cosmopolitan of Dicken St Charles Count-Palatine Tom the Omnipresent of Much Moulding upon Carpet

You shouldn't be doing anything else (if it's at all possible in your world) other than stuffing yourselves with goodness, or relaxing after stuffing yourselves with goodness, until at least the end of today. If you are that fortunate, personally, perhaps you could take a moment or two to reflect on how to help others who might not be quite so lucky get the chance to appreciate such things themselves.

* - because, after all, it seems that the main constant in human societies throughout recorded history has been a celebration of the return of the light (i.e. the days getting longer). Which is what the Midling tradition is all about - celebrating the knowledge that the seasons will come (in one form or another) as they always have for at least another year.

** - actually, there is one Friday, and one Fryday, each week. Did I mention that there are no Mondays?

*** - especially compared to the spambot afflictions and WorldNutDaily (just to name a prime example of) Republican't propaganda flooding the internets these days...

Posted by (: Tom :) at December 26, 2006 05:22 PM