The Funny Farm
Where life is beautiful all the time and I'll be happy to see those nice young men in their clean white coats...
Adventures of a Basic Force For Good in Our TimeTM
Just a quick note from an undisclosed location in the Great White North, where I'm about to depart for dinner and later to check out (primarily) the hockey game, (secondarily) the death throes of the Minnesota Timberwolves, and (additionally) some of the fine ales avaiable to the Canadian consumer.
D'oh! Caught in the act. Talk to you later...
Some miscellaneous kitty pics from the Funny Farm:
Bogart Checks on the Action Outside |
Cleo Lounges Around the Living Room |
Liz Cowers Under the Sofa in the Basement |
No, I can't believe that even a Repugnicant would be arrogantly idiotic enough to say this:
"It's extremely difficult to govern when you control all three branches of government" |
Er, when would it be any less difficult than when you can do whatever you want to do think is best for the country? When you can finally do things exactly the way you think will work best?
Well... it looks like I might be backing the wrong horse in the Cup Finals this year. Last night's 4-1 score wasn't indicative of the quality of the game - Tampa Bay wasn't even that good. I wish that there were that many holes in the Bhulin Wall a couple of rounds ago, but I guess it seems to crack over time just like the real thing did.
Then again, it's the first time the Bolts have been to the show. They looked a bit whupped from their conference final victory over the Flyers, too. And they should have put HappyBhulin, not CrappyBhulin in the nets. Oh, well - tomorrow's another game, and another chance for victory.
You can keep your World Series and your NBA Finals. The Stupor Super Bowl comes close - but it's only one game and, really, one night of sporting activity. No, for my money, I'd rather watch the Stanley Cup finals, thank you very much.
This year appears to look like a good series once again instead of the four to pumpkin blowouts that have been all too common in the finals (and even a blowout in the Cup final is preferable to an exciting World Series here at the Funny Farm).
We see that there are some bloggers over at OSP on both sides of the fence. Being a dual citizen gives me (in my own mind, where it matters most) the privilege of rooting for either team this year. And there are definite pros and cons no matter which side you choose:
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Calgary is (i)Canadian; (ii)a nice town, and (iii)fairly fanatical without being psycho about it. Tampa Bay is not only American, they are also from the heart of JEB!Land. Although they are also a smaller market / smaller payroll team (this year - Bill Davison is focusing on his Pistons a bit more right now. Maybe he just doesn't want to be photographed by all of the public surveillance they have in town...), and the city is pretty, too.
Calgary is young and fast. They have a few veterans and quite a few who will be playing for the Cup for the first time. Tampa Bay is also young and fast, and they only have a couple of veterans who have even been to the finals. |
So, I'll let you know that my reasons for rooting for the Tampa Bay Lightning to win the Cup are personal:
If they win, then my favorite team will have lost to the Stanley Cup champions; I'd like to see a new name on the Cup this year; Tampa Bay embodies my favorite style of hockey, the so-called 'firewagon' style of fast skating, freewheeling excitement that shows up in the NHL from time to time (although Calgary could be said to play a somewhat more, um, boisterous type of that style themselves. They remind me more of the old Leafs than the old Habs this year, though... and of course we have no use for the frelling Leafs here at the Funny Farm). And, finally, Calgary took a Cup away from my beloved Habbies in 1989. |
So, for purely selfish reasons, I am rooting for the Lightning to win this year. In any case, I hope that the Cup Finals prove to be an entertaining series of games.
How do you feel about it?
D'oh! Just like pRezNit Cain't Balance A Segway, I had to stumble off before feasting my eyes on everyone biting on the story. Nonplussed has one of the better pictures and one of the more unique theories on the subject.
Besides her comments on the unbalancing act in the WhiteWash House, Susie gives me some gold with the Suburban Guerrilla 's insights as an underemployed journalist about the So-Called Liberal Media. I wish some rich (cough cough Soros Buffet Gates cough cough) cash could find its' way towards starting some sort of publishing venture capable of providing employment at least temporarily to a few people like Susie. After all, they might have a greater chance of being gainfully employed in 2005 if a non-Bush candidate Kerry gets to be is elected before the year is out.
Kos had many fine things to savor this weekend, including some more on pResident pRatFall, but I of course loved the Bush joke the best.
After you've seen this (scroll down to the bottom - thanx Modulator for the link), you knew that something like this was coming down the pipeline (which we proudly present in temporally-enhanced Precognitive PostTM format for the first time):
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And, finally (for me), the LandSnark shows poor Garry Trudeau could be off to Gitmo to lose his head because (and there goes that G-D irony alert siren again) he found he could not imagine anything worse than what the Chimperor hath wrought upon us (No Head For You!). Then again, TBogg definitely had already been heading in the same direction for some time before that.
Now before I head off in yet another direction, I will try and toddle off for the night. By the time I awake, there will be yet another official pile of steaming crap from the 1600 Crew to watch run down the walls of the WhiteWash House. Stay tuned...
[Ed. Note: rancid linkrot has been corrected. Thanks for catching this, General!]
...from a little jaunt to the Great White North to visit some family and some old friends, play PC Doctor, and practice a bit of Texas Hold 'Em poker this weekend.
So I gots nothing to say but good night. We're toddling off early tonight and letting the magic of Tivo save some viewing pleasure for future eyeballing. Hope you enjoyed your weekend half as much as I did!
All these bloggers linking to the same wonderful song by the wickedly funny Eric Idle about the recent FCC ruling brought to mind an old ditty from the Great White North*'s own Gross Guys, Maclean and Maclean:
F^(% Ya F^(% Ya, f^(% ya, Eff Ewe See Kay Why Eh F^(% Ya, f^(% ya, Eff Ewe See Kay Why Eh I really hate your f^(%in' guts And I'd like to kick you in the nuts, so F^(% Ya, f^(% ya, Eff Ewe See Kay Why Eh I really mean it.... Eff Ewe See Kay Why Eh |
By the way, now that I have my own zone on the web, you can download a copy of this song right over here. !!**WARNING**!! Extremely profane language (if you don't approve of the F-word, that is) and primitive editing (I recorded the album to a wav file on the PC, then normalized the recording and ripped it to mp3) were used in the construction of this object.
Checking around a bit on the web showed me that Gary died in December 2001 of throat cancer, and Blair is making grain paintings and supporting some sort of initiative in the Peg (like, up on the frozen tundra, in Manitoba, eh?**). I hope he's doing well and I thank him for all the raunchy racist and obscene humour that he and his brother introduced me to during my formative years. I plan on releasing a couple more gems of theirs that I have rescued off of vinyl, as well as grab some more music once I get the sound studio components up and running at Computer Central. Right now it's time to get in the weekend frame of mind while checking out the incredible thunderstorms here in Pontiac and the results of their outpourings on my deck.
Stay tuned, campers. We still need to get to the morning's coffee...
*: Like, Hoser for, like, Canada, eh?
**: as a former employee of Garry Robertson Music Services (at the now defunct Toronto branch of the company back in its' heyday), I accept full responsibility for inaccurately portaying Winnipeg as being in the middle of a great big patch of frozen tundra. In fact, Winnipeg sits on a great big patch of ancient lake bed that feels like a piece of frozen tundra most of the year. How come you guys aren't like, power central, (eh?) with all those fierce winds up there? I'm sure you could stress test windpower generators in that environment.
So, like, we hope we didn't offend anybody from Winnipeg, eh?, like, when we made a (very bad) joke about it, eh?
[minor spelling and other edits. D'oh! That's what I get for posting before I get my coffee...]
A summit meeting between a couple of the powers that be at the Funny Farm:
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Fair Warning Advisory: Random guerrilla blogging may take place from undisclosed locations in the North American midwest this weekend.
...that the rumors of Andy Kaufman's death were greatly exaggerated, and that he should now be considered the greatest performance artist of all time. I really do.
I also want to believe in the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, the Invisible Cloud Being, and that Repugnicants are really nice people that only want the best for their fellow man. But Bill Bennett says that Andy Kaufman faking his own death twenty years ago is the better bet. Who knew?
I received two (that's right, two - not one, but two) surveys from the Democratic Party the other day. One was ostensibly from Senator Clinton, and one was from Terry McAuliffe, the Kerry campaign manager.
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They both asked the same platitudes and the same questions stacked the Democratic way, so that there's really only one answer:
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This could be a frelling Repugnicant survey if the questions were worded the other way around. And it would be just as effective as a marketing tool for people like me as this thing is - none at all. Guys, we're better than this! The Ranking The Issues section is the only place in either survey that I consider to be of any value whatsoever. That, and the empty space at the bottom for me to add my own comments (section IV in the DNC survey, and the missing part V of Hillary's, in the pretty pictures up above).
And since I will not be contributing monetarily to the Kerry campaign at this time, I see no real point in wasting even more of that record (for the Democratic Party) war chest on return postage. Not when I can just post my response up here:
To Terry and the DNC: You went way too negative way too early on your fellow Democrat, Howard Dean. You have been trying to emulate the bad guys too much, and want to beat them at their own game, instead of beating them with their own game - by exposing the lies behind the propaganda they try to sell the public and hammering at those lies with the facts in the matters when they try to abuse the system. I definitely think we should focus on the deficiencies of the other party and the strengths of our own. After seeing how the DNC bureaucracy fought for its own survival at the expense of those who gave the most to it, I do not feel you would properly utilize any donations I make to the Democratic Party. To Hillary: To both groups: Peace (: Tom :) |
This one has been sitting around the Funny Farm for a while now. But some may still heed its' message:
Knee jerk reactions To terrorist violence: Try and keep your head. |
And unfortunately it looks like it's going to have a dagger next to it:
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[This entry slightly edited and cross-posted to Open Source Politics]
Haiku John Derbyshire:
Genocide proposed By someone who claims to be A mild homophobe |
Thanks to Pandagon for wading through the dreck to find this lurking at the very bottom of the rancid pool, and to busy busy busy for inspiring me to turn into a haiku machine over the last few months.
Well,... I received a bit of feedback from a couple of my OSP compatriots, and one of my friends in the wilds of Soviet Canuckistan, after this morning's shameless plea for some attention. This has turned my normally sunny disposition into a frenzy of ecstatic joy. Now you know - it doesn't take much to make some people happy...
And I wouldn't have even mentioned this at all but for the knowledge that I have two emails to Bartcop featured at his site (one on the torture comments page, and one on the main page) today. Suddenly I don't feel as much like a voice in the wilderness as I used to.
I'm also reasonably certain that something is screwy over in the TLB Ecosystem - the meta tags and the link details aren't showing up on anybody's link details page. Which is why I can't see who has updated their links to point to the new site by using that resource. D'oh! Fortunately, I have other resources at my disposal...
We watch, and we wait...
Okay, now. This has gone on long enough - I have been over here in the new and improved zone for almost a month now, and so far the only comment I have received is from one of my most faithful of friends as well as a regular visitor to this humble abode. I know that there are others of you out there who have managed to make the leap from the old zone to the new one. But not only have I brought you some of the amazingly dry wit and the awesome wisdom (cough) that has become a hallmark of the Funny Farm, I have shown you some classic pictures, and shown you some pretty kitty pictures of my own - all the while managing to be pretty frelling funny if I do say so myself.* I can understand that those regulars who have made it here are not used to being able to supply feedback at this website. But now you can! And, really - no one has anything to say?
I have managed to remain studiously indirect in expressing an opinion of the current turmoil in the Middle East. Mostly. And tried to make things fairly relaxed while still pointing out some goings on in one of the other places we show up at regularly on the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan. All the while being a little bit better at pointing out where my reasoning is inspired, and giving credit to my fellow travellers on the way. And (not that I've been counting or anything, mind you) there have been at least three best of the blogs roundups at OSP without even a mention that the Funny Farm has moved. Even though I've done a couple of cross-postings to both OSP and the new home of the Funny Farm. I am showering every day. I'm even trying to post every day, too. And I'm reasonably sure it all looks good in IECaruba, NetScrap, and FireFox. So I'm just wondering what the deal is here. Is it something I said?
Could those of you who make it this far drop me a note in the comments, just to say hi? And it would be really nice if I got a little feedback from my compatriots over at OSP. (hint, hint)
* - and, yes indeed, I do say so myself...
A few things I have gotten to since I saw you last:
- some people go to church on Sunday mornings. I try to celebrate the fact that I am able to appreciate the wonderful journey I have been on for the last forty plus years in other ways these days. Today it involved a visit to the General's Place. It seems he has caught the Catholics in yet another example of blatant hypocrisy.
- and of course everyone is linking to this article by Sy Hersh which nails down the impeachment case for the 1600 Crew. That is, if we had any honest Republicans in the government any more.
And I actually have something of my own to show you later on this week. In the meantime, take a quick jaunt or two via the links zone. You'll be glad you did!
As always, we're somewhat behind the rest of the world in certain aspects here at .the Funny Farm. However, we did manage to catch this little article over at CounterSpin Central. Hesiod tells us of yet another impeachable offense that
And of course the Jesse and Ezra Show has been giving us lots to think about this weekend. It's particularly nice to see that some of the young whippersnappers still remember Ollie "All I did was lie to Congress" North and his appeal to Koresh and Kountry (we'd add Klan to it to, but then some might get a little too offended) in the early nineties. Quite frankly I'm amazed that they didn't scrub all of that out of the history books. Whod've thunk that Ollie would turn out to be the original for the Repugnicant mold? I commend them on connecting those dots together for the rest of us. And, now that they mention it, I do see the resemblance...
And once again (since it hasn't been seen here at the new digs as of yet, and yes indeedy ladies and germs we are coming up on day one thousand), with feeling, it's time to say:
Bush keeps lying People keep dying |
From perennial Funny Farm Fave Aislin, we have these cartoons for your amusement this weekend:
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Hopefully the Funny Farm can evolve beyond a Fliipery Fish in the Ecosystem before long. I guess cute doesn't work too well, with a coinciding upgrade (cough) of Blogger going on and all sorts of nonsense in the real world gumming up the works once again. Which is obviously why there are a few of you who haven't managed to update your blog links yet. But being a Flippery (and probably tasty) Fish would probably not be a good way to be presented in front of these, my new co-habitants:
I'm not sure which of these two ladies (cough) are older. They are the remnants of the crew that occupied Ally the Roulette Queen's previous abode, and both about seven years old or so.
This is Cleo |
This is Liz |
And this young lad was found by the two of us when we went out for a walk one day around her old place in Ohio. He was just a couple of months old when we found him, abandoned in a public park. We guesstimate he is about a year old now.
This is Bogart |
Hopefully there will be more opportunites for me to practice taking pictures of kitties with a digital camera. In the meantime I hope you like my new roomies half as much as I do...
And I thought I had busted it good last time, but you have honestly got to be kidding me. If they didn't save this for the Friday Afternoon Embarrassing Admission Press Briefing, then what, dear readers, are we in store for this coming weekend?
It appears that BabyDoc will still not be able to attend his twin daughters' graduations (one at the University of Tax-Ass Texas, and one at his own alma mater, Yale). He will be able, however, to attend three other commencements as the graduation speaker.
Thanks to Atrios for pointing us to this story. We would have gotten there ourselves, but the incestuous linkage here on the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan made me jump the gun a bit. Go to the General's place and check out the details for yourself...
[Sir! Permission to laugh uproariously at your letter to Dr. Laura, Sir!]
And of course a personal source of inspiration for Your Humble Narrator, shows us all once again why we think he's so good.
[thanks to Susie over at Suburban Guerilla for showing us the way to this essay]
It appears that some people weren't as intimidated as the wrongwingnuts thought they would be. Either that, or the fraternity hazing is waaay more intense over in the Middle East.
How long before they blame this on the ClenisTM?
[much thanks to the bloggers four over at corrente for showing me the way to this article]
Welly Welly Well Well Well... no sooner had my eyes viddied my new entry, and checked my links to make sure I hadn't bloggered them, then I now got to see an update on the situation about the decapitee from the bloggers four once again. And I thought that those amongst you (and you know who you are) who also make sure I don't blogger up my links should check out them and pretty much everyone out there in the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan. All the directions they send you off on will help distract you from the fact that there are still some sick bastards who think that the best solution to the problem is to kill them all and let the Gods sort it all out. Hopefully we don't all go off to kingdom come when it does take place unless can someone please take the idiot kings hand off of the button for a while?
As you may surmise I am still recovering from a rancid cold and a sore throat. I should gargle with salt water more often (D'oh!) and probably will before settling in to watch tonight's NHL playoff contest. And then tomorrow's another day. Will the Vile PigBoy be outraged at the beheading of one of his own? Will he tie Hitlery into the evil beheadees plan to disrupt the fabric of our carefully stage-managed disinformation from the Conservative Media awesome nation-building exrcise forced upon us by the evil liberals acting in concert with Saddam Hussein who personally ordered the 9-11 attacks when his assassination attempt on PapaDoc Bush was a miserable failure.
It's 6-1 Philadelphia over Tampa Bay and things have gotten down to the "message fight" stage in tonight's NHL playoff offering on ESPN. Since the raging pinkeye has now subsided to some gummy eyelids this morning, I can see well enough to know that this game has been over for a long time now. And since these maladies seem to take much more out of me as the years advance, it's time for me to say goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow...
Maybe it's because I've been sleeping like a baby this weekend (waking up screaming every two hours) and I've missed out on my usual blog surfing for the last several days. Maybe the dren has hit the oscillating aerial dispersal device a little too often lately and I haven't been able to clean the gunk off it yet. And maybe it's just that damned irony alert going off that is causing me to find this all interesting.
But I've just been on an intense winding blog surfing thread that has led to the Media Revolt Manifesto. This is a defining document, people. You all need to go read it. Now.
Needless to say (but we do anyway), the Funny Farm strongly endorses the sentiments therein and pledges to keep its' tongue planted firmly in cheek whilst trying to point you to some of the ways you can help make the media more than a propaganda arm of the elite.
As for the wild set of blog posts and the background material in all their links, you will probably need free subscriptions to the NYTimes, WashPost, and LATimes at the very least, to read everthing along the way. If you maybe think you should get into that whole making your own decision thing based on, you know, acquiring as much knowledge about what you're talking about as you can. And Earl Dunovant might be many things, including one of the most prolific bloggers out there, but I have not seen him advancing any partisan Afro American agenda that could be considered roughly analogous to David Duke. Or Michael the Savage Weiner or the Vile PigBoy or Ann Thraxx or any of the gazillion and one media whores spewing out Repugnicant propaganda over the earwaves lo these many years. He might occasionally be considered a slightly wryer version of Dennis Miller back when he was almost funny. When you get to read his own writings instead of the voluminous linkage he puts in his blog (which is a very instructional and helpful service to us when we can manage to make it there [cough]), that is.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go pry my eyelids open and put some more anti-pink-eye drops in them. Get out there and find the things that the corpo-weasels don't want you to see...
Change of Season Cold + Constant Cough + Infected Sinuses + PinkEye = One Unhappy Resident of The Funny Farm.
Talk amongst yourselves until I can function in a manner approaching normality.
This is being done for a plethora of reasons, but among the ones I want to tell you about:
I have been snarfing bandwidth from Whitehouse.org and I had no idea I was contributing to their spiralling costs to such an extent;
I want to test hosting pictures myself;
And I want to start showing you some pics of our resident felines as soon as I can get things in place and settled down around here at the new digs. But I haven't got the digital camera hooked into the systems right now (the install CD got lost in the move - D'oh!), so no pics of the local kitties.
So here's my first entry into the Friday Cat Blogging Set:
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Thanks go out from the Funny Farm to Jeebus' General for reminding us that today is National Christian Prayer Day. That's right, heathens need not bother to pray that their boss will let them celebrate this most righteous of days unless they are willing to accept the evangelical Christian's version of the Invisible Cloud Being Story - practitioners of the evil cults of Hinduism, Catbholicism, Islam, Judaism, and any of the other cults listed in the linked articles over at the General's place are advised to celebrate on their own. They can tune in to tonight's broadcast featuring pResident Flaming A$$hole Sword of Koresh on Christian Cable Networks (no, not that CNN. Yet.) if they would like, but they are not allowed to have any say in the content of the festivities. Wouldn't want any of that heathen taint on this offering to the Lord, don'cha know...
Gee, I wonder why I'm not so keen on some of the things supposedly done in the name of religion?
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[Editor's Note: about ten minutes after I put the finishing touches on this entry, I went over to find this post up over at H.F.P.S.T.W.N.. Is this a case of great minds thinking alike, or is it that fools seldom differ?]
It seems there has been considerable excitement lately about Ted Rall's latest cartoon, where he questions Pat Tillman's choice to go to war.
Me, I'm wondering a few things:
- If Sinclair Broadcasting is so upset about somebody reading a list of those who died in this senseless waste of American resources, why are they lionizing Pat Tillman as a hero? Oh, that's right - puffing up those who die for the Chimperor is somehow better morally than mentioning them, and showing us what they looked like, without commentary. Maybe Ted Koppel should have told everyone that all those dead soldiers would have voted for pResident Pinhead, and that their noble sacrifice was inspired by our divinely inspired leader, since that seems to be the definition of fair and impartial in the eyes of these clowns.
- If this type of talk about someone who sacrificed for their country is not okay, why is everyone in the conservative media going after decorated war veteran John Kerry?
- Why does the media focus on the death of one rich white boy, and refuse to talk about the sacrifices of everyone else over there?
I grieve for Mr. Tillman, along with every other serviceperson who has sacrificed their lives for the United States during the two snipe hunts military expeditions we are currently engaged in over in the Middle East. That includes everyone who is a casualty as well as the dead, as well as those who will never be the same again after the horrors they have had to experience in the field of battle. And I refuse to let the media whores turn any of their sacrifices into more fodder for the Bush Fellators At Work to use in support of the Usurper in Thief. Why do we bother doing a special on a member of the elite and his 'noble sacrifice', but we say nothing about the financially challenged who saw the military as their only escape from poverty?
It's awful funny to me that we don't hear any more about the Jessica Lynch story now that the powers that be found out she isn't 150% behind Tipsy McStagger. And how any military that come home and express doubt of our intentions over in Oilistan Iraq are summarily dismissed. Surely they have somewhat more informed opinions about what's going on over there?*
Ted Rall tends to use rather inflammatory language, and point out the more unbelievable shenanigans of the 1600 Crew, in a way designed to create controversy. He seems to have succeeded beyond his wildest dreams this time. I don't personally consider this to be one of his better cartoons, but I certainly don't see why it has caused this much outrage. I think his point was that the wrongwingnuts are using this man's death to promote their own partisan political agenda. So he did the same thing, except to further his ends. And you know how upset Drinky McDumbAss and the God Squad (not to mention the 101st Keyboard Chickenhawk Auxilliary neocons of the blogsphere) get when their carefully stage-managed progpaganda gets used by others for purposes not to their liking (see: Mission Accomplished).
So, inspired by the always witty Mad Kane (who has managed to find her way to the new digs - hope you enjoy your stay!), I decided to write you a little song parody today:
Everybody Wants To Slag Ted Rall (sung to the tune of Everybody Wants To Rule The World)
Well Ted Rall is back It's his only way There's some rooms where no light can find you So glad he's free to say it I can't stand this indiscretion All for freedom and for satire |
* - Yes, they have somewhat more informed opinions about what's going on over there. And, no, I'm not calling you, surely...
[Ed. Note:] minor cosmetic alterations may have taken place. Can you spot the difference?
Once upon a time, I was a deejay. I started out at a campus radio station and proceeded to work doing gigs in Toronto as a party DJ for several years. Weddings and company parties mainly, although I did manage to spend one summer as a DJ on a party boat that cruised around Toronto harbour. One of the most rewarding, and most dangerous, jobs I have ever had. I carted around about five grand in equipment and five grand in music by myself, and often collected client payments while at the gig. I never even considered the possibility of being mugged during this time period - it was the Eighties in Toronto, after all - and I never even came close to having it happen. But I would never consider doing that sort of thing anymore. I have a feeling that I have overextended my karma in that regard.
The only reason I bring this to your attention is to tell you that, like so many others here in blogtopia (y!sctw!), I often listen to music while banging away at the keyboard constructing more bloggy goodness to infotain you with. For some strange* reason, I can't seem to get this song out of my melon:
I got a bone to pick with you Not-so-friendly boys in blue When you come out of the station and into the street Everybody beats a hasty retreat Well it was late one Friday, I'm a little bit wrecked You're on your way "to serve and protect" You buzz out of the cruiser like bees from a hive And ask me if I want to 'go for a drive' (go for a drive?) Chorus: That's why I'm riding on the Cherry Beach Express My ribs are broken and my face is in a mess And I made all my statements under duress 52 Division, handcuffed to a chair I'm joining the line up to fall down the stairs I tell you I am innocent, I try to explain 'We're just making sure you don't do it again' (do what again?) Chorus: That's why you're riding on the Cherry Beach Express Your ribs are broken and your face is in a mess 'And we strongly suggest you confess' I confess! I confess I am mystified By the way you're occupied I confess I'm horrified Why are you so terrified? Does the pain get any less if I confess? And I made all my statements under duress... 52 Division, handcuffed to a chair I'm joining the line up to fall down the stairs I tell you I am innocent, I try to explain 'We're just making sure you don't do it again' (do what again?) Chorus: That's why I'm riding on the Cherry Beach Express My ribs are broken and my face is in a mess That's why I'm riding on the Cherry Beach Express And I never dreamed it would be like this I never dreamed it would be like this I never dreamed it would be like this I never dreamed it would be like this |
A little nugget from the WayBack machine for your amusement: Cherry Beach Express by Pukka Orchestra.
* - This link requires a (free) membership at the Washington Post.
This entry cross-posted at Open Source Politics
[Ed. Note: minor cosmetic alterations may have taken place. Can you spot the difference?]
I'm guessing there's a few sleepy, angry Dead Things fans (and some better rested, and happier, Pistons fans, too!) this day here in the Motor City. For safety's sake, please, make no disparaging remarks about the Red Wings around metro Detroit for the next couple of days.
I would offer the use of some crying towels, but I figure that's part of the basic Dead Things Fan Membership Kit anyways [Zing!]. Three Cups in eight years ain't too shabby a haul when you get right down to it...
It appears that others are slowly but surely showing up at the new digs, and linking to it in the ecosystem. I have evolved six levels since opening up here a week ago.
My thanks to all and sundry who have made it here so far. I'm looking forward to more visitations from the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan in the days to come...
Reprogram your dialing machines so that your hordes of telemarketers do not inadvertently cold-call one of your subscribers. Particularly when that one was ripped off in the hardware he was sent and was basically told to go piss up a rope because they had already pocketed their ill-gotten gains he had already paid off the credit card charges and there was nothing he could do about it. Because then that customer will - especially if you interrupt his evening meal to disturb him - talk like a mark easy sale potential customer to your telemarketer well beyond the point where they really should be getting along to the next call. And then, once they have been made aware that they are in fact dealing with a current customer, who by now has all the information he needs to get back in touch with the management should he be treated (ahem) less than respectfully, they try to skate gracefully out of the situation. Usually. At least tonight the young lady on the other end of the line was polite enough to let me suggest that they update their databases and remove the phone numbers of existing customers without hanging up in my face.
Do I think they will listen to me? Sadly, No!*
* - is it okay to use a blogtopian** phrase in your post if you link to the author when you do?
** - y!sctw!***
*** - yes! skippy coined that word (I think)!
Last year on Loyalty Day, I posted a copy of that year's proclamation along with the snarky commentary you've all grown to nurture and cherish in your heart of hearts over the last couple of years. I also mistakenly announced that this was the first ever Loyalty Day. Boy, was I ever wrong.
To begin with, it wasn't even pResident Pinhead's first Loyalty Day proclamation. That was in 2001. (Here's a link to 2002's proclamation, in case you're collecting the set) To demonstrate how much more out of touch with things that I am in this instance, apparently Loyalty Day has been around in one form or another since the 1930s, and was first officially proclaimed in 1958.
The only reason I'm even telling you this is because The Jesse and Ezra Show pointed out this year's grandstanding waste of taxpayer money to promote fealty to the Chimperor official state proclamation in this post, and it inspired me to set my record straight, so to speak. Hope you made sure you were loyal to the powers that be yesterday...
Jesse Taylor of the blog still known as Pandagon is blogging for Jerry Springer.
No, seriously. This should be great fun for the whole family. Imagine if the Jerry and Jesse Show were to produce a Howard Stern-like "Springer Factor" to turn the electoral votes in Ohio away from the Chimperor. Then combine that with Stern's Anybody But Republicans campaign (which you can keep up with on his new and improved website). And the whole world will be breathing a sigh of relief along with the majority of America this Christmas.
And, yes, as amazing as it may seem, I am occasionally tuning in to Stern in the morning while I'm going to work. The points that Stern makes about the BFEE* have been well known here in the Fashionable Left Bank of Blogistan for a couple of years now, and quite possibly they will resonate in the mainstream before this is all over. But it sure feels weird. Sorta like living inside the definition of strange bedfellows (no, not that Strange Bedfellows) if you know what I mean...
Anyways,... off to enjoy a rare Saturday night out. I might have been watching an exciting NHL playoff game broadcast to me from Tampa Bay tonight. But, no - the Habs have traded their skates for golf spikes until (hopefully) next fall. and today's games will be over in time for me and my baby to get out for a night on the town.
* - BFEE = Bush Family Evil Empire, in case you weren't already aware of that little factoid...