The Funny Farm

Got The Funk

^{Fryday, 5 Reckning 2008}

But it's not a good groove these days:

After winning the first game of the series in overtime, the Montreal Canadiens duffed the next two games of the series, and now stand in a 2-1 series hole that they need to get themselves out of if they hope to continue on the road to the Cup. So that beat is a bit out of synch with the rhythms of my heart.

I have also been sick with whatever bug has been going around lately. It will be two weeks Thursday since its' onset here at the Funny Farm, and hopefully I will be past the major situational challenges presented to me by this malady by then. Lots of coughing, chest congestion, sinus congestion, plus headaches, bodyaches, loss of appetite, and diarrhea. Sorry if I have not been inspired to contribute at any of the usual hangouts - it hasn't really been much of a priority of late.

And it's just more of the same old same old in the political arena: A rich white old guy who has been flying around the country in his wife's jet (in violation of his own campaign finance law) has dared to call one of the other candidates an elitist. And the major media are too busy drinking his (free to them) alcohol and eating his (free to them) food to call him on his incredibly hypocritical horse hockey. Oh, yeah - he hid his own assets behind his wife's skirts, and is not releasing her tax returns to the public. Maybe that bellweather of the mass media Chris Matthews can gush over McClueless for another couple of months while ostensibly being propped up as the everyman face of the Democratic Party. Or maybe we can get some more 'helpful advice' for the Democratic Party from Karl Rove in the pages of a major media weekly.

Then there was a co-worker, supposedly objectively neutral politically, who decided that he would spout Republican't talking points to me in an email discussion of the current political climate. Here's his opening salvo:

Then, he started to call in his Republican't friends to pile on. For some strange reason, they seemed to get a bit upset when I asked them why they supported letting american soldiers rape their fellow american soldiers (because, of course, they all believe that the reports of american soldiers raping Iraqi teens are just propaganda operations, put out by Al Qaeda, that liberals are only too willing to believe [due to their being traitorous surrender monkeys who want to install sharia in the courts of america]*) - and were surprisingly unwilling to examine any evidence I presented in support of my assertions. Along with consistently and constantly misrepresenting liberal viewpoints, and consistently and constantly spewing Republican't ones. To hear this from one of the many ditto monkeys in the office is one thing. But, coming from someone who (up until this incident) I believed was more or less objectively neutral politically (as he has claimed to be for some time now), and whose opinions I respected, this type of behavior has only reinforced my opinion that I should refrain from challenging the (Republican't) status quo within my place of business.

So, yeah - things have not been a bed of rose petals for Your Humble Narrator of late. And I have had no desire to burden you, dear reader, with a litany of my woes - and no desire to blow faux sunshine that's not smiling upon me of late up your a$$. Thus the non-updates you haven't seen around here lately. I'm hoping the Habs will give me some sort of positive distraction Tomorrow night...

* - seriously. Some of them honestly believe that I should be taken into custody because of the things I say about Putsch and the Republican't Junta.

On To The Next Round

^{Fryday, 28 Goodenuf 2008}

Montreal Canadiens 5, Boston 0. Even though my good friend Aislin seems to think that they've gotten a little too beat up in the process, I found quite a bit of hope in last night's game:

- Alexei Kovalev is a very talented hockey player, but quite often it seems as though he has motivational issues. And when he gets frustrated (as he was in the middle games of the series), sometimes he tries too hard to make things happen, ends up staying out on the ice too long, and then causes an odd man rush opportunity for the opponents because he's too tired to get back on defense quick enough. Or gets a dumb penalty due to having to resort to other means to stop his opponents when they blow by him.

This behavior came to a screeching halt when Saku Koivu returned to the ice. Besides getting back one of the best faceoff players in the game and a rock steady center who has no problem wearing the 'C' and playing on the fourth line if need be, Koivu seems to me to have provided just enough inspiration to keep Kovalev focused on the job at hand and more in control of his frustrations.

- Carey Price was absolutely unbelievable last night. As a former goaler, sometimes you notice a few things, and I noticed that he handled an awful lot of quick, up close chances last night. Someone parked just outside the crease, getting a quick pass in on the tape, and then taking one (or more) quick shots on the net. Those were among the toughest challenges I faced when I donned the pads*. And Price just shut them all down.

I was also remembering the draft last year - I was with a friend from Toronto in a shop on Queen Street when we heard Montreal take Carey with the number six pick of the draft. And everybody in the place stopped what they were doing, and we all looked at each other as if to say (and some of us said it anyway) WTF?!?. Shows what we know - and also shows us why we're not making draft day decisions for the Habs. Gainey and the rest of the staff involved in that decision deserve some big-time props for it.

- The Habs, even though they are still engaging in too much illegal shenanigans (slashes primarily, but that trip of Chara should have given Boston a potentially game-changing five-on-three power play), look to me to be trying to cut most of that crap out. I saw Koivu drag a couple of players away from after-the-whistle confrontations that might have cost them penalty minutes, and I saw them trying to make clean checks instead of going for the cheap shot.

I must say that I definitely noticed a marked difference between last night's game and the game five 5-1 loss the last time the two teams were at the Bell Centre. The game six 5-4 loss in Boston was one of the best playoff games I've seen this year, and let me hold hope that game five was the anomaly in the set.

Tonight's game between the Philadelphia Flyers (Eastern conference seed 6) and the Washington Capitals (Eastern conference seed 3) will determine the matchups in the East in the next round - Philly wins and they play Montreal (Eastern conference seed 1) - and the New York Rangers (Eastern conference seed 5) play the Pittsburgh Penguins (Eastern conference seed 2), but if Washington wins then the Habs play the Rangers and the Penguins play the Caps. Pittsburgh took out the Ottawa Senators (Eastern conference seed 7), and New York defeated the New Jersey Devils (Eastern conference seed 4) in their opening series.

In the Western Conference, the final game of the first round takes place after the Philadephia - Washington game, when the San Jose Sharks (Western conference seed 2) host the Calgary Flames (Western conference seed 7) in the seventh game of their series. The Detroit Red Wings (Western conference seed 1), the Dallas Stars (Western conference seed 5) , and the Colorado Avalanche (Western conference seed 6) have all made it to the second round, having defeated the Nashville Predators (Western conference seed 8), the Anahiem Ducks (Western conference seed 4), and the Minnesota Wild (Western conference seed 3) respectively. So, if San Jose wins, they play Dallas, while Detroit plays Colorado. If Calgary wins, they play the Wings, and Dallas plays Colorado (and Detroit would be the only higher-seeded team to win their opening series in the Western Conference).

Stay tuned, fellow campers. There's a bit of a ride ahead. I have managed to catch whatever's going around these days, so I wouldn't expect too much in the way of bloggy goodness on these pages in the next little while. So, take it easy, and keep your stick on the ice!

* - although the first Montreal goal, where Boston goalie Tim Thomas got caught waaaaay out of position while trying to move across the crease, brought back quite a few uncomfortable memories too...

One More For This Round

^{Fryday, 21 Goodenuf 2008}

Montreal Canadiens 1, Boston Bruins 0. First playoff shutout for rookie goaltender Carey Price, and first Habs shutout in the playoffs since 1986 - at least according to my recollections of the stat man's prattling right after the game. Amazingly, as usual in hockey games, none of the announcers mentioned the possibility of a shutout on air during the course of the entire game*.

This could all be over for the Bears On Beans after Thursday night's game at the Bell Centre. I certainly think that a couple of days of focusing on why the frelling power play hasn't been working might be in order, but Monseiur Carbonneau certainly has impressed me so far with his coaching skills, and I would not presume to provide him** with any advice.

Thanks for a good game, and hope you're able to get your glazzies in front of a teevee that has the game on Thursday night. Share and Enjoy!

* - I counted. Twice.

** - unlike [shudder] Mario Tremblay, whom I did not hesitate to inform, loudly and insistently, from the other side of the telly, that his coaching skills (or lack therof) left much to be desired as far as I was concerned.

Off The Schneid

^{Fryday, 21 Goodenuf 2008}

Well, it finally happened:

Boston Bruins 2, Montreal Canadiens 1 (OT). Not only did Boston finally beat the Habs for the first time this year, they were in the lead for almost a full period during the game.

You Humble Narrator would have provided you, dear reader, with this sports update sooner - but excessive celebratory adventures put me out of commission after Saturday night's overtime victory, and yesterday was (regrettably) spent getting back into the rhythm of the working week.

Game Four in the series is tonight in Boston, and Game Five is in Montreal on Thursday night. Share and Enjoy!

There Was No Joy In Beantown Last Night

^{Tuesday, 17 Goodenuf 2008}

If you were a Bruins fan, at any rate...

Montreal Canadiens 4, Boston Bruins 1.

One of the more interesting statistics from last night: Montreal has never trailed Boston at any time this year. In the eight regular season games ([8 games] x [60 minutes per game] = 480 minutes of playing time in regulation [plus any regular season overtime [max 5 minutes per game]) they played this year, Montreal was tied with Boston for approximately 170 minutes, and in the lead for over 300 minutes. Even my favorite football team, the Miami Dolphins, were in the lead at some point during their season of futility.

I have already undertaken a wager with a co-worker who is a Dead Things Red Wings fan: whichever of Montreal or Detroit makes it further in the playoffs (Montreal goes farther = I win!). And, even though it might be akin to stealing candy from a baby, I would dearly love to make a bet with any of the Sadly, No! crew that are Bostonians on the outcome of the current series. How about it, guys?

Congratulations...

^{Friday, 13 Goodenuf 2008}

To the Montreal Canadiens for distracting me from the incredibly depressing nature of the current soon-to-be-depression by having the best record in the Eastern Conference of the NHL this year.